You've been thinking about it for a while. Maybe a friend suggested it, or you stumbled across the idea while searching for something — anything — to help you through what you're facing. Spiritual counseling. You're curious, but you're also nervous. What actually happens in there?
The honest answer: it's probably nothing like what you're imagining. There's no altar, no sermon, no one asking you to close your eyes and pray (unless you want to). A spiritual counseling session is, at its core, a conversation between you and someone trained to listen at the deepest level. Here's what that looks like in practice.
Before the Session: The Intake Process
Most spiritual counselors, including Chaplain Joyce, begin with an intake process. This isn't a test. It's a brief form that helps your counselor understand your background, what brought you in, and what you're hoping to get out of the experience.
You'll typically share:
- Basic information — your name, contact details, and any relevant health or safety notes
- What brought you here — grief, a life transition, a crisis, spiritual questions, or simply a feeling that something deeper needs attention
- Your spiritual background — not to be judged, but so the counselor knows where to meet you. Whether that's a lifelong faith tradition, a general sense of spirituality, or "I don't know what I believe anymore" — all of it is valid
- Your goals — even if your goal is just "I want to feel less lost," that's enough to start
The intake form can usually be completed online before your first visit, so your session time is spent on what matters: you. Complete your intake form here.
What a Typical First Session Looks Like
A first spiritual counseling session usually lasts about 50 minutes. Here's what happens:
Welcome and settling in
Your counselor creates a calm, comfortable space. There's no rush. If this is your first time doing anything like this, they'll acknowledge that it took courage to show up. Because it did.
Sharing your story
You talk. The counselor listens — not the way most people listen (waiting for their turn to speak), but with full attention. They may ask gentle questions to help you go deeper, but there's no interrogation. You share as much or as little as you're comfortable with.
Exploring meaning together
This is where spiritual counseling diverges from traditional therapy. Rather than diagnosing or prescribing, the counselor helps you explore the spiritual dimensions of your experience. What does this loss mean to you? What beliefs are being challenged? Where do you find strength?
Closing and next steps
The session ends with a brief check-in: How are you feeling? What, if anything, would you like to explore further? There may be a suggestion for reflection between sessions — not homework, but an invitation to notice something in your daily life.
What You Don't Have to Worry About
Let's address the fears that keep people from scheduling:
- "I'm not religious enough." Spiritual counseling is for everyone — deeply religious, spiritual but not religious, questioning, or none of the above. A good counselor never requires you to subscribe to any belief system.
- "I'll be pressured to pray or participate in rituals." Not unless you want to. If prayer, meditation, or other practices would be meaningful to you, your counselor may offer them. If not, they won't.
- "I'll have to talk about God." You can if you want to. You don't have to. Spiritual care is about your inner life — however you understand that.
- "I'll be judged for my choices or beliefs." A clinically trained chaplain has sat with people across every conceivable belief system and life situation. Judgment has no place in the room.
- "I'll have to commit to ongoing sessions." Your first session is just that — a first session. There's no obligation to continue. Many people find one or two sessions enough. Others return weekly for months. It's entirely your pace.
The only thing you need to bring is yourself. You don't need to have your thoughts organized, your questions articulated, or your emotions under control. Come as you are. That's the whole point.
How Spiritual Counseling Differs From Therapy
People often ask how spiritual counseling compares to traditional therapy. They're different tools for different aspects of the human experience:
- Therapy focuses on mental health: cognitive patterns, emotional regulation, behavioral change, and clinical diagnoses
- Spiritual counseling focuses on meaning: existential questions, purpose, connection to something larger than yourself, and the inner life that transcends psychology
Many people benefit from both simultaneously. A therapist helps you cope. A spiritual counselor helps you make meaning. Neither replaces the other, and an ethical provider in either role will refer you when your needs cross into the other's territory. Learn more about the types of spiritual care available.
Choosing the Right Counselor
Fit matters. Here's what to look for:
- Clinical training. Look for chaplains who completed Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE) — the standard for professional spiritual care
- Non-denominational approach. Unless you specifically want a counselor within your faith tradition, choose someone who serves all backgrounds
- Warmth without performance. The right counselor feels genuinely present, not performatively warm. Trust your instinct
- Clear boundaries. A professional spiritual counselor is transparent about their scope, their fees, and what they can and can't offer
Taking the First Step
The hardest part is almost always the decision to begin. Once you're in the room, the rest unfolds naturally. You don't need to be ready, articulate, or "spiritual enough." You just need to show up.
Chaplain Joyce LLC offers individual spiritual counseling sessions in person throughout San Diego and virtually for anyone nationwide. The first step is a simple intake form that takes about 10 minutes to complete. Book your first session today.
You've been carrying this long enough. It's time to set some of it down.